16 Wishes
(2009/Image Blu-ray) + Mrs. Miracle
(2009/Sony DVD)
Picture: B-/C Sound: B-/C+ Extras: C-/D Main Programs: C-
Prior to
the 1980s, the ideas of dreams and wishes really amounted to freedom,
imagination, hope and a better tomorrow, but since then, it has oddly led to
being stuck with dumb people, dysfunctional families, stuck in nightmares that
are passed off as dreams and have been stunningly regressive as fantasies and
as storytelling. Two new examples are
now out in time for the holidays, another factor that has become tainted in
this recent cycle of bad comedy/drama.
Peter
DeLuise directs the silly 16 Wishes
(2009), with Disney alum Debby Ryan plays Abby, whose 16th birthday
brings the same number of wishes. Lucky
girl? Of course not! To fill 90 minutes, she will be a ditz,
making all kinds of mistakes, not thinking out what she has done and causing
more trouble than good. I never bough
this for a minute and she has little chemistry with Jean-Luc Bilodeau (of the
family TV show Kyle XY). It is like a happy Twilight Zone episode (a contradiction in terms) versus not even
being a better extended episode of Bewitched
or I Dream Of Jeannie. I was dreaming of a surprisingly good comedy
and got bad formula instead. Lame.
Almost worse
is Doris Roberts (Everybody Loves
Raymond, Angie) in the title
role of Mrs. Miracle (also 2009), a
goofy telefilm based on some kind of best selling book (who bought this!) from
writer Debbie Macomber. She plays Mrs.
Merkle (get it, Merkle is close to being spelled like… well, you know) who
becomes a sort of Mary Poppins on downers, helping a young widower (James Van
Der Beek, long past the fall of Dawson’s
Creek, once again playing an extremely slight variant of himself) who has
twin sons (oh, the irony) and here comes Christmas. He also needs a woman and of course, everyone
needs to be stuck in a family, or they don’t deserve to be happy or enjoy the
holiday, implying anyone else is disposable, but not as disposable as this
mess. Affirm Films backed this dud along
with Hallmark Cards and their tired cable channel. It shows and wow, is it boring!
The 1080p
1.78 X 1 digital High Definition image on Wishes
is weak, including in its color and has more motion blur, while the anamorphically
enhanced Miracle DVD miraculously
looks worse with all the same issues, plus being that much softer. The DTS-HD MA (Master Audio) 5.1 mix on Wishes is limited in soundfield, has
dialogue that is weakly recorded and is overall not what a new recording should
be in any medium, while the Dolby Digital 5.1 mix on Miracle is again worse
with weaker recording, weaker soundfield and overall low-sounding
playback. Extras on Wishes include a trailer, Music Video and Cast Interviews, while Miracle offers none.
- Nicholas Sheffo
