Eyeborgs
(2010/Image Blu-ray + DVD)
Picture:
C+ Sound: B- Extras: D Feature: D
Some bad
films know when they are bad and Richard Clabaugh’s Eyeborgs (2010) just has to be one of them. A very bad, dumb and unintentionally funny in
the worst possible way would-be sci-fi mish-mash that begins by ripping off
Paul Verhoeven’s Starship Troopers
(1997, reviewed elsewhere on this site) but looks like one of its bad sequels
and gets that bad immediately.
In the
near future, civil rights have been thrown out the window (again?) and all the
telecommunications networks have been centralized monolithically, so we get yet
another bad techno-police state thriller with no brains. To add to this, the title refers to walking
mini-robots with giant Cyclops-like eyes that are watching us all for the
government. However, they start to kill
and the bodies start piling up. What
makes the worse is that the covers imply they are as big as Godzilla or King
Kong, but they are about as tall as a DVD case… and they kill.
Too bad
they did not kill the screenplay by Fran & Richard Clabaugh, which is silly
from the get go and TV Highlander star Adrian Paul and all around character
actor Danny Trejo cannot save this from being more than a future MST3K candidate. Yes, it is that bad and now you can see for
yourself, even with only one eye open.
This is blindingly stupid and should be avoided at all costs.
The 1080p
2.35 X 1 digital High Definition image is surprisingly soft throughout,
especially in the majority of the scenes where digital animation is not being
used, leaving the anamorphically enhanced DVD looking even a little worse, but
shockingly not much more. Director of
Photography Kenneth Wilson II shot this in Fuji 35mm film supposedly, but you would
never know that with how poor the over-digitized results are.
The
DTS-HD MA (Master Audio) lossless 5.1 mix on the Blu-ray is a little better
than the Dolby Digital 5.1 mix on the DVD, but by a slim margin, so you don’t
get much difference here either, meaning either format will do for this one in
this particular case. Extras in both
versions are the same and include behind the scenes featurettes, lame Deleted
Scenes and a trailer.
- Nicholas Sheffo
